The Law of the Sod

Working as a freelancer is odd.

Waiting for the phone to ring

You have periods where you dont stop working, and periods when your phone rings and you pounce on it in anticipation of a job only to find its a marketing company wanting to help you get a refund on your no existent credit card or loan repayments.

These lulls in work make you doubt whether you are in the right job, should you just get a nine to five?
What job would I do if I did?

Lounging on the Sofa

Then just as your sat on the sofa in your pyjamas watching Flog It at 3 in the afternoon contemplating whether your having microwave noodles or toast for tea, the phone rings and your asked if you can get to Leeds in the morning for a one day shoot. RELIEF!!

One day jobs as a freelancer invariably lead to more work if you prove yourself on that first day. So you have to make the right impression.

So your job extended to three weeks and then your phone does not stop ringing. Job offers roll in from across the TV world and as your already working all you can say is "I'm Sorry I'm already booked". All good you think but why couldn't they have rang last week when you where starving hungry and wondering whether it was OK to put the heating on or to buy food instead. Its defiantly Sods Law.

Procrastinating

The quiet period is good though if you put the time to good use. I tend to have good intentions to write a  few synopsis's and maybe add a few chapters to my book. Instead I find myself procrastinating, drinking hot chocolate sat watching Gilmore Girls and arranging coffee outings with Jet2 and Dimmock. As Dimmock gave up on the TV industry in this country and got themselves a nine to five, coffee outings have changed to evening dinner outings instead, cheap places mind you, Im not working remember and dont know when the next job will be, so cant be splashing the cash!

Coffee Outings

So coffee is arranged in town with Jet2 and dinner the following evening with Dimmock and then your phone rings. A weeks work in London starting tomorrow on an emergency conference. You cant say no so you cancel your plans and find yourself booking rooms in London and looking at the best way to get there. At least Jet2 and Dimmock have worked in the industry and understand when you have to cancel, but family can be a tad upset, but this is your career and you have to do it to get to where you want to be.

So Tv isn't Glamorous, especially when your sat at home with unwashed hair and wishing the phone to ring, but you cant be disheartened when your not working, think of other things you can be doing, and invariably when you make plans that phone will ring. If you really want to work in TV you have to be determined.

Paranormal Part 1; Cake gate

Working on a paranormal show has given me some of my best TV experiences as a runner, I have explored derelict buildings tested night vision goggles, travelled to areas of the UK I would never have gone to and met some interesting people.

My first time working on this show myself and Dimmock had travelled down to London. I would be the camera and sound runner and Dimmock was the green room Runner.

Yvonne's Wine

Dimmock had it easy all she had to do was make sure Yvonnes wine was cold and topped up. My job was fairly easy too keep the camera and sound people topped up with tea and cable bash one of the pedestal cameras.

Rehearsals went well and everyday before the live show I got to play with the cameras and do the rehearsal instead of the camera man, I was loving it. We had another runner who was floor running and their job was to help out the floor managers that was until “cake gate”.... 

Before Health and safety gone mad

During the middle of the shoot it was a cast members birthday and so during the show a cake was to be presented to them, this was the days before health and safety gone mad and we could actually light the candles as long as we had a bucket of sand, fire extinguishers of every kind and a full fire station on standby. 

Rehearsals had gone well the runner was to step forward to the aisle, camera 1 would turn to them camera three hold shot of cast member and everyone else wides of the audience and presenter. Round of applause and Que. the cake. Runner walks forward and presents it. Easy or so it would seem.

Cake

“And 5,4,3,2,1 we are live” ... “welcome back now its a very special day today....” floor managers pushes the runner and cake into place in the aisle. cameras turn to positions. Audience applause... director shouts over talkback.. Que. the Cake........ and........ Nothing...... Que. the cake...........still nothing the runner isn't moving the audience are looking round as they have been clapping for a while and nothing has happened. Que. the f**king Cake screams the director, all around the room the floor manager, assistant floor manager, the camera assistants, the sound men and me are all waving the runner on frantically.

Eventually they step forward with the cake and down the aisle the audience applause increases when they finally see the cake and its over just like that....

Never again was a cake brought on for any celebration during the subsequent shows I worked on, and the next day Dimmock was the floor runner.