Ive been compared to the build of a man

I was reminded today of an occasion that now seems amusing when at the time was a little weird, bordering on insulting.

Wrapped up against the cold, a must on location

It occurred a few years back, as I was taking that step up from runner to Camera Op. I was called in last minute to help film a stunt that was going to happen in the local town centre. I knew nothing more than this.

It was a cold November day and I had wrapped up warm in lots of layers as we were going to be outside all day. Turning up early as they wanted me to film a lock off shot of the set being put into place.

As a cherry picker turns up to the area I am standing, I set the tape running. theres not much else I can do for now except guard the camera from the stray drunks and walk of shame students wondering back home in the early daylight hours. At this point I have lost all feeling in my fingers and my stomach is grumbling loader than the buses engines that pass by.

The best coffee you will ever drink.

Eventually the cherry picker is in place and the kind driver offers to pop to the shop and purchase a coffee. This coffee the first on an outside broadcast in the early morning is the best coffee you will experience. If you don't drink hot drinks, when you've stood outside for 3 hours in snow with no hat or gloves you'll soon take it up.

A few hours later at 10 am a steady influx of crew start to arrive on set and a small tent is set up. the director arrives on the next train from the south and we start the briefing. Today we will be filming a stunt with a very famous singer. They will be performing escapology whilst inverted.


So cherry picker in place cameras set up crowd building the star is running late and hasn't finished filming in another location yet. And the straight jacket need testing. 

In my head the VIP is a tall man so looking round the crew I'm trying to guess which unlucky man is going to get roped in, when the director asks my height. Oddly I look at him and say "5'2 I'm too short."

"No" comes the reply your just the right height and build. "I'm the same height as ****** *******?" I thought they were tall! Oh, well ok lets get on with this.

I get strapped into the straight Jacket

I get strapped into the jacket and the magician tells me how to escape. Lucky I did this very quickly without to much struggle limiting the embarrassment of writhing around in front of my peers in a straight jacket. Also makes me wonder if I was Houdini in a past life.

Not this Rapper with Glasses

Im still embarrassed at the fact Ive been compared to the build of a man, but in this job no day is the same and you come to expect the weird and wonderful. The call comes through the VIP is on route. Action stations, I'm waiting for them to arrive when a small man turns up with a gaggle of producers and all of a sudden the stunt starts. Im a little caught off guard. I'm still waiting for the tall man with the glasses that sings, not this short lad who is the same height and build as me. It suddenly downs on me that this is not the VIP I had in my head, this is not the rapper with the glasses but another short rapper and I can now see why I was the perfect stand in.

Your Working Day is Someone's Working Week

Working in TV is often very long hours, especially as a runner, your working day can easily be 16 hours long thats someone's working week. If you add in travel time them you can easily be hitting 20 hours a day.

Up at 6am, drive to work, stand, carry, drive, and shop all day then tidy up before your drive home. Arrive home for 11pm and bed ready for the same again tomorrow. Its a never ending cycle until you work up the ladder and even then depending on the path you have taken and the job you are working on the hours might not change.

When you start as a runner the wages are poor and you often find yourself taking on other jobs just to get by and saying no to a job often means the phone doesn't ring again. So the need to succeed in the industry spurs you through.

Not long after I started I was doing just this, luckily all my jobs turned out to be in the same building so I didn't have to travel between workplaces. if I had I dont think I would have been able to do it, I only just survived as it was.

Living off Flavia Coffee

My working week started on a Thursday morning at 7.30am and finished on a Tuesday evening at 7pm. During this time I was working on three separate programmes and living off Flavia coffee machines and RedBull.

My Thursday first shift was a regular one. And I was used to the long day and standing. Then there was a call to work on an evening show that was live and ran throughout the night. As long as my normal job was finished by 10pm I couldn't see why I couldn't do both.

So the first Thursday started and I finished my day job by 9pm, nipped back to the car park and sat in my car for an hour then started my evening shift. this was an easy shift in TV runner terms as it only meant carrying all the stuff to studio, setting up the green room and keeping everyone supplied with drinks. The show finished at 3am. Home for a couple of hours sleep and then back for the same again on Friday.

Then Ugly Betty called, they desperately needed an extra pair of hands on a new show they where making and the shifts fitted in around my other jobs so I agreed.

Regularly found asleep in a Chesterfield 

This added a Saturday to Tuesday 9am -7pm onto my other jobs. Knackered isn't the word. I could regularly be found hiding backstage in my down time asleep in a chesterfield, or hidden behind the lift dozing in a chair.

The great thing about the evening stint is that everyone looked after themselves after it was all set up, and so I could easily sneak off for 40 winks. Upstairs on route to the studio the lift opened up in the centre of the room, with mirrors all around. This meant you could sit on a chair behind the lift and when the lift made a noise it would wake you, you could then scan the room to see who was coming as to whether you had to move or could stay hidden away and close your eyes again.

I really dont recommend it to anyone after the shoot had finished 6 weeks later I was fit for nothing. Although the extra money was good, it didn't really further my career. and that is what you have to ask yourself. Is it worth it? Will it get me further along the media Path I want to take. If the answer is no then let another runner take the job. You dont know what opportunities you will miss by taking the work, when the call could come in offering something you really want to do.

Being a runner doesn't mean you have to actually run.

Being a runner doesn't mean you have to actually run. Although on some occasions it maybe necessary. 

No running

You get asked to do the most random things. Mostly shopping and standing in for people so rehearsals can go ahead.

As I've told you before I met Stop whilst working on an afternoon chat show and they where assaulted by Nancy lam. Since then Stop has taken running at times quite literally. 

Don't run in the studio

Always running everywhere and always being told "Don't run in the studio." "Stop running" but it wasn't till a shopping trip that Stop realised that being a runner didn't mean you had to run everywhere. 

Sent out with a shopping list and an envelope of cash Stop left the studio, ran across town to the chemist, purchased the first product on the list and rounded the corner to Primarni. 

Having been sent out to purchase a birthday cake, gift and joke present for a member of staff from the office. Stop was on a mission to get it all as quick as possible and make it back to the studio in order to make a good impression of speed and responsibility.

Running around the store Stop purchased the vouchers and made for the door. As they ran down the street a hand grasped their shoulder and grappled them to the floor. 

Grappled to the floor

A large man in a fluorescent jacket loomed over radio in hand. " I have them." the radio crackles and Stop looks up " Can we ask you back to the store please we would like to search you". 

Dragged back to Primarni Stop was taken to an office and asked to empty their pockets. Having made a run out of the store Stop had raised the attention of the store security guard as having obviously stolen something from the store. Why else would anyone be fleeing the store at pace?

Looking rather red faced not at the running but the fact they had to reveal the contents of their pocket Stop tried to explain, " I was just doing my job!, I needed to get to Tesco and buy a cake then get back to work." 

This wasnt good enough for the security team who still demanded they empty their pockets. Slowly stop removed the primary voucher and receipt from their pocket, and envelope of cash, the shopping list and a reaching back into the cavernous hole that was Stops pocket a small tube wrapped in a receipt from the chemist was placed slowly on the desk. Not being able to look at the men in the room in eye with embarrassment the joke present lay on the desk.

Tube of Lube

What is Stop doing running from a Primarni store with a pocket full of lube and a gift voucher? The security staff of the store will never be able to tell anyone the story and have them believe it but it's true. They had stopped a person who hadn't taken anything but as a job had to run around town with a pocket of lube and buy a cake! 

Returning to the studio rather red faced Voucher and Lube in hand, Stop realised that being a runner didn't mean you have to run.